Here I am

[wayfaringwordhack]

I felt prompted to check my friends feed after weeks and weeks of absence due to all the busyness that is life, and I have caught up with you all as far as DW will let me without clicking on the feed of each individual friend. As broad as it may be, I want to wish all of you fulfillment and peace, journeys and discoveries, hope and love in 2019.

As the result of my conditioning, with the turn of the year, I am looking back--myopically and selectively, I admit--on the last year and peering into the new with hopeful thoughts of Different and Better.

My major failed goal of last year was not sending out my children's book by March end, much less finishing it.  I would like to rectify that this year. I have no set date this time. I need to sit down with the project and make specific goals to achieve by specific dates. I like asakiyume 's idea in this post about at least opening the document every day.

I was overwhelmed and consumed with my gardening this past year, and while I feel I did a lot, I did not succeed a lot. That sucks, to spend so much time and to have so little to show for it in this lean season. Even throughout the chief growing season, I do not feel we had abundance.* My goal this year is to be smarter about what I grow based on what performed well and what we eat the most of. Logical, I know, but it is a both a difficult thing to predict based on the weather and my own lack of experience. We have the grow tunnel in place this year, so that should help, but I am also planning a major layout overhaul of the existing veggie patch and feeling a panicky about it already because, as usual, I feel I don't know enough (perfectionist me abhors not getting things "right," don't you know), and true to form, I did not do the preliminary work in the autumn when it was time to get the ball rolling to prepare this year's beds.

However, my word for this year is not "Stress-Free" (two words?), but I am going to try to give myself grace. I want to learn and do; do and learn. Fail and forgive; forget and assimilate. 

To use the Google Dictionary: Grace: courteous goodwill. and Merriam-Webster: : disposition to or an act or instance of kindness, courtesy, or clemency.

Yeah, Grace. That is my word for this year.

Have you set goals or do you choose a word to define and focus your coming year?

_________

*We had lots of tomatoes, lots and lots, but even zucchini, which everyone talks about having soooooooo much of, did not give that well with the drought.

Comments

[asakiyume]

Grace is a great word-theme for the upcoming year.

I have so much empathy for your experience with the garden. I never went into it as all-in as you are (we only ever had our suburban 1/3 acre), and I suspect I didn't study as much or work as hard at things in the moment (... just thinking of my lazy nature), but I did put in some degree of effort, and I was dismayed by how lackluster my results were. We had one good crop once: cucumbers. That was rewarding; we pickled lots of them. But some things I really worked on trying to grow (burdock, for instance--which is a weed! I know! But it's used in Japanese cooking, and I wanted to try to grow it with long straight roots, and THAT I couldn't accomplish. The seeds would barely germinate.) And ... well, I don't want to depress you. I do think it can be done; I just think it took way more effort, experimentation, intervention when things were going wrong, and ability to live with failure than I had in me.

--Also, honestly, when you have something like a drought, I think you have to give yourself a pass. No farmer, no matter how good, can grow without water.

[green_knight]

I highly recommend the 'stare at mss' method: of all of the writing tips I've ever seen for 'being more productive' making myself look at the WIP every time I open my computer and every time I shut it down was hands down the most useful. No word count goals. No pressure. Just opening up the document, reading through the last bit I wrote, then going on to other thing if I'm not feeling inspired. A lot of the time I write a sentence or two.

I like 'grace' as a theme.

And while I know it's hard, don't worry too much about gardening - there are so many factors at play. You're making an honest effort. Much of the rest is luck.

[wayfaringwordhack]

LOL. I first read that as "stare at MESS" and that felt very apt. :P

I have yet to start this because ACK! my backups of Scrivener from my old laptop--before changing the harddrive--don't seem to be viable. I am trying not to freak out and am doing other stuff to keep from breaking down in complete despair should the files really be gone, but I am going to have to look into it more soon.

As for the garden, egads, it is already time to start thinking about starting some seeds. I will definitely concentrate on making an honest effort and releasing the rest. :)

[rimturse]

We've talked about this before, but gardening really is trial and error and what might work for your neighbour might not work for you.

Remember to enjoy it as well. :)