Follow-up to "Vanity" Poll
17 Mar 2007 05:57 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wayfaringwordhackI was going to answer all the responses individually, but since everyone said basically the same thing, I thought I would save myself some time and just post my thought here.
As I'm sure you all figured out, the question I posed was a loaded one. Unless you are a reporter--in that you give all material without bias and never present your own opinions, thoughts, or view--it is perfectly natural that the information speaks of *you* even if you aren't the topic of the post. For example, whenever I type up something about Mayotte, I don't even try to remove myself from the equation. First off all because I'm not a reporter. Second because I am, first and foremost, making memories for myself. And third because I don't want to give "Just the facts, ma'am." As many said, these are our journals, so it is normal that they are about us. Nothing bizarre in that.
I'm going to take this away from the topic of journals for a moment, though, to say that in life, as in journaling, the default POV for all of us is self, First Person. I don't speak of all this because I'm promoting being egotistical, quite the opposite in fact. But I do think that recognizing self comes first is an essential step in being able to open up and think about others. By taking into account your position in the world--physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually--you can better grasp your own beliefs and importance, much like using radar. It is, in my opinion, good and right to consider others. It is good and right when you realize you aren't alone. It is good and right to maintain healthy relationships with your fellows, in as much as *you* can. You accomplish all that by nurturing, educating, and bettering self...
because at the end of the long, long day, self is the only one you can change.
As I'm sure you all figured out, the question I posed was a loaded one. Unless you are a reporter--in that you give all material without bias and never present your own opinions, thoughts, or view--it is perfectly natural that the information speaks of *you* even if you aren't the topic of the post. For example, whenever I type up something about Mayotte, I don't even try to remove myself from the equation. First off all because I'm not a reporter. Second because I am, first and foremost, making memories for myself. And third because I don't want to give "Just the facts, ma'am." As many said, these are our journals, so it is normal that they are about us. Nothing bizarre in that.
I'm going to take this away from the topic of journals for a moment, though, to say that in life, as in journaling, the default POV for all of us is self, First Person. I don't speak of all this because I'm promoting being egotistical, quite the opposite in fact. But I do think that recognizing self comes first is an essential step in being able to open up and think about others. By taking into account your position in the world--physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually--you can better grasp your own beliefs and importance, much like using radar. It is, in my opinion, good and right to consider others. It is good and right when you realize you aren't alone. It is good and right to maintain healthy relationships with your fellows, in as much as *you* can. You accomplish all that by nurturing, educating, and bettering self...
because at the end of the long, long day, self is the only one you can change.
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no subject
Date: 17 Mar 2007 11:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 18 Mar 2007 08:08 am (UTC)But conflicts aren't always a sign of indecision... sometimes they're a creative cue that's either submerged or we're resisting.
Sometimes when I have a writing problem I'll catch myself saying "But I can't do X", only to realise that part of me had already identified X as the solution.
The "How much is your blog about you?" question felt like a self/other dichotomy question. And that made me wonder: are there some things you blog that you're uncomfortable about (pretty unlikely I thought), or are there maybe some things you would like to blog about, but which you don't?
no subject
Date: 18 Mar 2007 08:25 am (UTC)But conflicts aren't always a sign of indecision... sometimes they're a creative cue that's either submerged or we're resisting.
This happens to me a lot in life and in writing both, usually resulting from either fear or pride. I like to think that I'm getting better, though, at listening to the telltale niggle or discomfort that presages such a block on my part.
no subject
Date: 18 Mar 2007 08:37 am (UTC)Arrg - condolences! I often wish that I had more influence on others so that I could do more good, but I sometimes suspect that what I really need is to have less impact on others, so that I do less harm.
no subject
Date: 18 Mar 2007 03:44 pm (UTC)When I was a young whippersnapper, everyone--children and adults alike--were always asking me for advice, even on heavy stuff. Oddly enough, the older I got, the less inclined I felt to share my opinions on how others should lead their lives (doesn't mean I don't have my opinions *g*). I preferred, and still do, to influence by example. Or that's what I tell myself. In fact, I think, secretly and not so secretly, I would like to impact a few of them with a precise blow of the hammer to make them do what I know is best. I keep my hammer tucked away most times; once or twice I've tried to wield it in the form of guilt. I never like myself when I do that, though, so it doesn't happen very often.
And then there are the million and one other times where we don't even realize someone is there watching, being either influenced or impacted...
no subject
Date: 18 Mar 2007 04:11 pm (UTC)The few good things we do never balance it all out, and the good that we do is largely enabling rather than direct action. So I feel anyway.
We could balance it out by living in individual caves, only venturing out on good days with our best faces on, and then only communicating for ten minutes at a time... It might just work. :D
no subject
Date: 18 Mar 2007 09:31 pm (UTC)hehe. Yes, I had a good chuckle with a friend at the fact that I went merrily skipping down Tangent Lane with my last response.
And even then we do more stuff than we can examine and manage at the time, which means that we're doomed to screw up by negligence and bias all the darn time.
Absolutely, (*sticks firmly on topic*) and knowing that can drive some to hopelessness, others to fear of action and inability to make a decision, especially when we are unable to draw those lines between self and other. (Example: fairly assessing and assigning responsibility) I honestly think though that the majority of us can and do draw the lines more leniently in favor of ourselves. *hears the sweet whispering of another tangent, but keeps those thoughts to herself*
Going hand in hand with my belief that my life is mine to make of it what I will is the idea of responsibility. Being responsible and living "the examined life" is, I think, the key to the balance you mentioned. No, we will never stop making mistakes; we'll never cease inadvertantly injuring others; we'll never make this world a perfect place of peace and total harmony, but I think claiming ownership of faults, all the while realizing that we are "only human, after all," is a good place to start for making a go at it.
no subject
Date: 18 Mar 2007 09:53 am (UTC)And this is why you need to work on your "not giving a hoot". *grin*
no subject
Date: 18 Mar 2007 03:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 18 Mar 2007 03:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 18 Mar 2007 03:46 pm (UTC)